Your Five - Your Biggest Personal Influences
By Jeff Ramnytz
One of the biggest influences in a person’s life are the five people they let into their inner circle. These are the people they are around the most. It’s easy to forget that who these five people are is an important decision, and a choice you have control over.
Every choice you make, small or big, affects your life positively or negatively. You can choose your attitude, choose to work hard or not, choose to be on time, and choose to be respectful.
The one big choice that influences your life the most is who you choose to spend time with the most. Your choice in friends and influences is also a choice on your quality of life.
In my 32 years in education I have seen the results of these choices over and over again, both positive and negative.
If you hang around with unmotivated people, or people with bad attitudes, there is a good chance you will adopt that same mentality. If you surround yourself with positive influences, these are people who have goals, work hard, and treat people with respect, these positive attributes will likely rub off on you as well! A positive influence isn’t necessarily someone who agrees with everything you say, either. It’s someone who raises your standards and pushes you to be your best self.
I know it sounds like common sense. But it’s not as easy to see or understand as a child.
This is why it’s so important for parents and guardians to be aware of who their children choose as friends, who they hang out with during the day and in the evening - and who influences them on social media.
If you are able to get a handle on this at an early age, you will have a better opportunity to help your child get and stay on a positive path in life.
If you observe negative changes or a negative outlook in your child, take a hard look at the closest individuals to them (including yourself!). You and your child may have to make some hard choices about continuing a connection. The young adolescent mind is more easily influenced by peers and has a strong desire to “belong.” This need to belong grows with age. This is not something we should only keep an eye on only when our children are young. This observational practice for parents is even more important as your children get older.
In the Barberton City Schools one of our goals is to provide students - at all levels - with an opportunity to be involved in positive activities with like-minded, positive people after school hours. We have many after school clubs, organizations, and athletics your children can join. We have mentoring and other organizations that help support the social and emotional needs of your children.
Many times a student that visits me for discipline at the district level is not involved in any clubs, organizations, or sports. They also do not have enough positive influences in their lives. As I speak to these children - and their parents and guardians - I encourage them to get involved in positive activities. Just get involved in something bigger than yourself!
These activities can be life changing, and positive lifelong friends are often made. Students may even have the opportunity to discover their pathway in life. It is our job to help them with this process - before, during, and after school - as much as we can.
I encourage everyone to surround themselves with as many positive and supportive people as they possibly can, especially our children. Ultimately, your quality of life depends on it, and we want everyone to have an exceptional life!
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